Mr. Workin' has been soooo busy for the last several months.
I know that his intention is to be successful and provide for his family. But somewhere or somehow along the way the line has been crossed; it leaves me feeling like I am a single parent.
He is easily working 80 hours a week. I signed up to parent 24/7, right...and really that means, for waking hours I try to be available. I am not sure how Mr. Workin' working 80 hours a week instead of his standard 55 changes how "on" I have to be for the kids, but it does... A LOT!
I am tired, quite tired.
AND there are so many things I want to be doing for my quality of life and the house, but I just don't have it. I want to exercise and decorate and play with the kids. Right now, I am doing laundry and cooking and cleaning and cleaning and running around.
So...here it is. I am hiring a cleaning crew to come in every other week.
Monday, April 12, 2010
Easter
We made a super quick trip to Big Horn for Easter this year. It was fun...it was the first holiday we (the Swanson's) were all together since Todd and Candace got married. Todd was a little crabby, but I am probably the only one affected by it. The kids love to be with family. There is so more attention to go around.
I could go on and on about the dynamics of family and my assessment of the weekend, but I am not sure it's worth the writing or then reading.
I am so very grateful to have family that values time together. I look forward to many more holidays together.
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Meme...it is about me.
The Ten Questions Meme
Time for another meme.
1. When you were born, how much did you weigh?
Laramie, WY ~ 8lbs, 2ozs. I hurt the hell out of my tiny mama.
2. What's you're sugar poison?
All things depending on my mood. I am not a huge candy fan. And if it is candy I crave, it's chocolate for sure.
3. If you had to choose between meat and cheese for the rest of your life, which would you choose? Then be specific.
This question just makes me sad, I wouldn't want to be without either. I think it has to be meat. I love cheese, but I cannot spend the rest of my life without prime rib or pork meat. Mmmmm, meat.
4. What, is your opinion, is the worst song ever?
It's a tie, the theme song to JC Superstar. Hate it. Also, I have never understood, the need to listen to any song by NIN. They hurt me.
5. Who was your favorite teacher growing up and why?
I had a bunch, but my middle school social studies teacher, was great. He seemed to have a good balance between fun and control. He cared. I wouldn't have been as successful in college without my English class my senior year. She was an amazing help.
6. What personal activity, when performed in public, bothers you the most?
Either, using a tooth pick. Or blowing your nose and looking in the tissue.
7. Ok, there's a $50 bill lying on the ground. You pick it up. Dumbfounded by your incredible luck, what do you selfishly purchase?
Pedicure. No question.
8. Do you have a recurring nightmare? If so, explain.
The three little pigs are mean and then chase me and catch me and swing me around over thier heads by my underware. I want them to let me go, but I know I will fly into the mud.
9. Name one place on Earth you've never been, but vow to visit at least once.
Italy.
10. You notice that question #9 wasn't really a question. You feel smart for catching such a small detail. What else can you do really well that reminds you how smart you are?
Eeeeshie...I am not good at this. I am good at something, and I know I am smart enough...
You tell me, what is it that I do that makes you think I must be a little smart?
Time for another meme.
1. When you were born, how much did you weigh?
Laramie, WY ~ 8lbs, 2ozs. I hurt the hell out of my tiny mama.
2. What's you're sugar poison?
All things depending on my mood. I am not a huge candy fan. And if it is candy I crave, it's chocolate for sure.
3. If you had to choose between meat and cheese for the rest of your life, which would you choose? Then be specific.
This question just makes me sad, I wouldn't want to be without either. I think it has to be meat. I love cheese, but I cannot spend the rest of my life without prime rib or pork meat. Mmmmm, meat.
4. What, is your opinion, is the worst song ever?
It's a tie, the theme song to JC Superstar. Hate it. Also, I have never understood, the need to listen to any song by NIN. They hurt me.
5. Who was your favorite teacher growing up and why?
I had a bunch, but my middle school social studies teacher, was great. He seemed to have a good balance between fun and control. He cared. I wouldn't have been as successful in college without my English class my senior year. She was an amazing help.
6. What personal activity, when performed in public, bothers you the most?
Either, using a tooth pick. Or blowing your nose and looking in the tissue.
7. Ok, there's a $50 bill lying on the ground. You pick it up. Dumbfounded by your incredible luck, what do you selfishly purchase?
Pedicure. No question.
8. Do you have a recurring nightmare? If so, explain.
The three little pigs are mean and then chase me and catch me and swing me around over thier heads by my underware. I want them to let me go, but I know I will fly into the mud.
9. Name one place on Earth you've never been, but vow to visit at least once.
Italy.
10. You notice that question #9 wasn't really a question. You feel smart for catching such a small detail. What else can you do really well that reminds you how smart you are?
Eeeeshie...I am not good at this. I am good at something, and I know I am smart enough...
You tell me, what is it that I do that makes you think I must be a little smart?
I want a baby...
Isn't wanting a baby a funny thing? There have been times in my life when I really, really wanted a baby, when wanting a baby was the worst thing I could imagine, and when wanting a baby only lasted moments at a time.
Have have several friends that are unable to have a baby for one reason or another. Their pain is so palpable. I also have a handful of friends with secondary infertility. I am not sure which would be worse. Once, you have had a baby, shouldn't you just be thankful for the baby or babies you already have? On the other hand, if you know you can do it, wouldn't it be awful to feel like it had been taken away from you?
I have wanted to be a mama for as long as I can remember. I made a point in my life to go to school, get married and then have a babies. When I decided it was time to have a baby, there was nothing stopping me. And here I am six years later and I am starting to feel that huge all consuming pull again.
If you want a baby, try all the means at your disposal to conceive a baby, and don't get one, when do you stop trying to have one? There are so many different circumstances, but it just breaks my heart that women have to face this.
My friend in Oregon adopted a couple of kids, that was awesome for her and her family, but adoption isn't a blanket solution. And there are two people involved in infertile couple, what about if one person finds adoption a solution and the other doesn't?
Children are incredibly hard one a marriage. Young children are needy and physically draining. But I would think lack of children could be just as dangerous. If you love someone and assume that part of your role together include parenting, what happens? I am not sure. Mr. Workin' has said, he isn't sure we could have stayed together without children. We both cam to the table with a huge desire to parent.
I feel like I would have to redefine myself without the role of mommyhood. Children are an huge mirror for your own issues. There is nothing like watching your children to see some of your biggest short comings or fears in life.
It's just occurring to me, I think it would be nice to have been forced to look at myself outside of parenthood. There are times I feel lost in the abyss.
Maybe I will find myself in another baby?
Have have several friends that are unable to have a baby for one reason or another. Their pain is so palpable. I also have a handful of friends with secondary infertility. I am not sure which would be worse. Once, you have had a baby, shouldn't you just be thankful for the baby or babies you already have? On the other hand, if you know you can do it, wouldn't it be awful to feel like it had been taken away from you?
I have wanted to be a mama for as long as I can remember. I made a point in my life to go to school, get married and then have a babies. When I decided it was time to have a baby, there was nothing stopping me. And here I am six years later and I am starting to feel that huge all consuming pull again.
If you want a baby, try all the means at your disposal to conceive a baby, and don't get one, when do you stop trying to have one? There are so many different circumstances, but it just breaks my heart that women have to face this.
My friend in Oregon adopted a couple of kids, that was awesome for her and her family, but adoption isn't a blanket solution. And there are two people involved in infertile couple, what about if one person finds adoption a solution and the other doesn't?
Children are incredibly hard one a marriage. Young children are needy and physically draining. But I would think lack of children could be just as dangerous. If you love someone and assume that part of your role together include parenting, what happens? I am not sure. Mr. Workin' has said, he isn't sure we could have stayed together without children. We both cam to the table with a huge desire to parent.
I feel like I would have to redefine myself without the role of mommyhood. Children are an huge mirror for your own issues. There is nothing like watching your children to see some of your biggest short comings or fears in life.
It's just occurring to me, I think it would be nice to have been forced to look at myself outside of parenthood. There are times I feel lost in the abyss.
Maybe I will find myself in another baby?
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
And further more!
I nabbed this from a childhood friend, Danielle Arnoux. It makes a nice point.
" This morning I was awoken by my alarm clock powered by electricity generated by the public power monopoly regulated by the US Department of Energy. I then took a shower in the clean water provided by the municipal water utility. After that, I turned on the TV to one of the FCC regulated channels to see what the National Weather Service of the National Oceanographic and Atmospheric Administration determined the weather was going to be like using satellites designed, built, and launched by the National Aeronautics and Space Administration. I watched this while eating breakfast of US Department of Agriculture inspected food and taking the drugs which have been determined as safe by the Food and Drug Administration.
At the appropriate time as regulated by the US Congress and kept accurate by the National Institute of Standards and Technology and the US Naval Observatory. I get into my National Highway Traffic Safety Administration approved automobile and set out to work on the roads built by the local, state, and federal departments of transportation, possibly stopping to purchase additional fuel of a quality level determined by the Environmental Protection Agency, using legal tender issued by the Federal Reserve bank. On the way out the door I deposit any mail I have to send via the US Postal Service and drop the kids off at the public school.
After work, I drive my NHTSA car back home on the DOT roads, to a house which has not burned down in my absence because of the state and local building codes and fire marshal's inspection, and which has not been plundered of all it's valuables thanks to the local police department.
I then log on to the internet which was developed by the Defense Advanced Research Projects Administration and post on freerepublic.com and Fox News forums about how SOCIALISM in medicine is BAD because the government can't do anything right. "
" This morning I was awoken by my alarm clock powered by electricity generated by the public power monopoly regulated by the US Department of Energy. I then took a shower in the clean water provided by the municipal water utility. After that, I turned on the TV to one of the FCC regulated channels to see what the National Weather Service of the National Oceanographic and Atmospheric Administration determined the weather was going to be like using satellites designed, built, and launched by the National Aeronautics and Space Administration. I watched this while eating breakfast of US Department of Agriculture inspected food and taking the drugs which have been determined as safe by the Food and Drug Administration.
At the appropriate time as regulated by the US Congress and kept accurate by the National Institute of Standards and Technology and the US Naval Observatory. I get into my National Highway Traffic Safety Administration approved automobile and set out to work on the roads built by the local, state, and federal departments of transportation, possibly stopping to purchase additional fuel of a quality level determined by the Environmental Protection Agency, using legal tender issued by the Federal Reserve bank. On the way out the door I deposit any mail I have to send via the US Postal Service and drop the kids off at the public school.
After work, I drive my NHTSA car back home on the DOT roads, to a house which has not burned down in my absence because of the state and local building codes and fire marshal's inspection, and which has not been plundered of all it's valuables thanks to the local police department.
I then log on to the internet which was developed by the Defense Advanced Research Projects Administration and post on freerepublic.com and Fox News forums about how SOCIALISM in medicine is BAD because the government can't do anything right. "
Saturday, March 27, 2010
Since when do...
Since when do five year olds use the word immediately? Wyeth said, "If Dad doesn't come out here immediately, I will forget the dance moves I want to show him." I think the best part, is the seriousness in which it was delivered.
Since when isn't OK for teachers to have expectations of appropriate behavior in their class rooms? Ella fell to her knees in a puddle of tears when I dropped her off at school on Wednesday morning. She has been pulling this little stunt from time to time over the course of the year. I traded glances with the teacher, and darted from the room. I know that best thing is to just leave. When I retrieved Ella from school, she told me, "Erickson (she never remembers the Mrs.) told me to get up and stop acting like a baby." Which to me sounds like what Ella needed to hear. She is old enough and smart enough to know who she can "work" and who she can't. So, I was telling this story to a friend of mine and she became incensed and said she couldn't believe I would let a teacher or anyone for that matter, speak to my child like that. Really? Isn't there a whole component of school that is teaching your children to accept direction from someone other than their parents?
Since when is reform a bad thing? I am absolutely blown away by the disgusting behavior of many Americans so intolerant of change in this country. Isn't the one thing in life we can count on, change? You might need step in and guide me down from the soap box...
But another thing. There are all these people talking about things they have no real concept of and using fear as a big social order mechanism. It's gross.
That's it for now... I need to go check my blood pressure.
Since when isn't OK for teachers to have expectations of appropriate behavior in their class rooms? Ella fell to her knees in a puddle of tears when I dropped her off at school on Wednesday morning. She has been pulling this little stunt from time to time over the course of the year. I traded glances with the teacher, and darted from the room. I know that best thing is to just leave. When I retrieved Ella from school, she told me, "Erickson (she never remembers the Mrs.) told me to get up and stop acting like a baby." Which to me sounds like what Ella needed to hear. She is old enough and smart enough to know who she can "work" and who she can't. So, I was telling this story to a friend of mine and she became incensed and said she couldn't believe I would let a teacher or anyone for that matter, speak to my child like that. Really? Isn't there a whole component of school that is teaching your children to accept direction from someone other than their parents?
Since when is reform a bad thing? I am absolutely blown away by the disgusting behavior of many Americans so intolerant of change in this country. Isn't the one thing in life we can count on, change? You might need step in and guide me down from the soap box...
But another thing. There are all these people talking about things they have no real concept of and using fear as a big social order mechanism. It's gross.
That's it for now... I need to go check my blood pressure.
Thursday, March 25, 2010
Basically....
I am totally blogging to avoid the 7,205 things I should be doing.
I need to be pricing for the consignment sale and the carnival is sneaking up on me too. Thankfully, the carnival is falling together nicely. The committee has been amazing. We are going to look at all the games on Sunday. Hopefully with some cleaning and maybe a quick coat of paint we will be ready to go. As it turns out, we have a hot dog machine, a sno cone machine and a popcorn machine all sitting in storage. I just wish I was a bit more handy with tuning up those machine. It has to have been at least four years since they have been used. Oh, and we had Baker Bob agree to let us use his cotton candy machine AND he is donating all the sugar. See! The next hurdle will be Pepsi. I wish this was more of a Coke town, but am grateful that Pepsi is so generous.
____________________________________
The kids are growing especially fast in the last several months. Maybe they can sense the green grass peeking through and the buds starting to plump up and know that Spring is a time for growth.
Ella is soooo tall. She looks a little silly in 3T clothes at this point. But, the thought of moving her up to a larger size is painful. She is a 2T waist and 4T length. Oh, how I wish I had her challenges.
Fara is doing quite well with potty training. As her father said the other day, we sure aren't going to have to worry about that child getting what she wants out of this life. I hope she can hold onto her tenacity.
Wyeth is fairly certain he is deeply misunderstood in his unjust world. Poor guy. He plays hard, learns hard and sleeps hard at this age. He is looking forward to endless hours of outside fun in the coming months.
Mr. Workin' is working on a HUGE deal that ha been all consuming in the last several weeks. I am proud of his dedication to his career. I can't imagine being with someone I had to encourage to find a job. We are blessed to have our daddy.
And, me, I am sooooo busy with this and that. I love it. I like to be needed by others aside from the needy chicklets that live here. :)
I need to be pricing for the consignment sale and the carnival is sneaking up on me too. Thankfully, the carnival is falling together nicely. The committee has been amazing. We are going to look at all the games on Sunday. Hopefully with some cleaning and maybe a quick coat of paint we will be ready to go. As it turns out, we have a hot dog machine, a sno cone machine and a popcorn machine all sitting in storage. I just wish I was a bit more handy with tuning up those machine. It has to have been at least four years since they have been used. Oh, and we had Baker Bob agree to let us use his cotton candy machine AND he is donating all the sugar. See! The next hurdle will be Pepsi. I wish this was more of a Coke town, but am grateful that Pepsi is so generous.
____________________________________
The kids are growing especially fast in the last several months. Maybe they can sense the green grass peeking through and the buds starting to plump up and know that Spring is a time for growth.
Ella is soooo tall. She looks a little silly in 3T clothes at this point. But, the thought of moving her up to a larger size is painful. She is a 2T waist and 4T length. Oh, how I wish I had her challenges.
Fara is doing quite well with potty training. As her father said the other day, we sure aren't going to have to worry about that child getting what she wants out of this life. I hope she can hold onto her tenacity.
Wyeth is fairly certain he is deeply misunderstood in his unjust world. Poor guy. He plays hard, learns hard and sleeps hard at this age. He is looking forward to endless hours of outside fun in the coming months.
Mr. Workin' is working on a HUGE deal that ha been all consuming in the last several weeks. I am proud of his dedication to his career. I can't imagine being with someone I had to encourage to find a job. We are blessed to have our daddy.
And, me, I am sooooo busy with this and that. I love it. I like to be needed by others aside from the needy chicklets that live here. :)
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